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40s Burma Shave

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BURMA SHAVE
1940s


1940
Said Juliet
To Romeo
If you
Won’t shave
Go homeo
Burma-Shave
 
 

When you drive
If caution ceases
You are apt
To rest
In pieces
Burma-Shave
 
 

All little rhyming
Jokes aside
Don’t be content
Until you’ve
Tried
Burma-Shave
 
 
You can’t reach 80
Hale and hearty
By driving 80
Home from
The party
Burma-Shave
 
 
Substitutes and
Imitations
Send ’em to
Your wife’s
Relations
Burma-Shave
 
 
He married Grace
With scratchy face
He only
Got one day
Of Grace!
Burma-Shave
 

 

College cutie
Pigskin hero
Bristly Kiss
Hero
Zero
Burma-Shave

 

 
Buy a jar
Take it from me
There’s so
Much in it
The last half’s free
Burma-Shave
 
He’s the boy
The gals forgot
His line
Was smooth
His chin was not
Burma-ShavE

Put your brush
Back on the shelf
The darn thing
Needs a
Shave itself
Burma-Shave

 
 
It’s best for
One who hits
The bottle
To let another
Use the throttle
Burma-Shave

 
 
Don’t pass cars
On curve or hill
If the cops
Don’t get you
Morticians will
Burma-Shave

 

With glamour girls
You’ll never click
Bewhiskered
Like a
Bolshevik
Burma-Shave

 

A scratchy chin
Like bright
Pink socks
Puts any romance
On the rocks
Burma-Shave

 

Always remember
On any trip
Keep two things
Within your grip
Your steering wheel and
Burma-Shave

 


Give hand signals
To those behind
They don’t know
What’s in
Your mind
Burma-Shave

 
 
The bearded devil
Is forced
To dwell
In the only place
Where they don’t sell
Burma-Shave

Substitutes
Would irk a saint
You hope they are
What you know
They ain’t
Burma-Shave

Prickly pears
Are picked
For pickles
No peach picks
A face that prickles
Burma-Shave

 

Guys whose eyes
Are in
Their backs
Get halos crossing
Railroad tracks
Burma-Shave

 

A Christmas hug
A birthday kiss
Awaits
The woman
Who gives this
Burma-Shave

 
Just spread
Then pat
Now shave
That’s
That
Burma-Shave

1941
Here’s
A good deed
For a scout
Tell your dad
All about
Burma-Shave

 

 
They missed
The turn
Car was whizz’n
Fault was her’n
Funeral his’n
Burma-Shave
 
     

Tell
The dear
Who shops around
That half a buck
Buys half a pound
Burma-Shave

 

She kissed
The hairbrush
By mistake
She thought it was
Her husband Jake
Burma-Shave

 

He used
Umbrella
For parachute
Now rejects
Every substitute
Burma-Shave

 
Don’t stick
Your elbow
Out so far
It might go home
In another car
Burma-Shave

 
Soldier
Sailor
And marine
Now get a shave
That’s quick and clean
Burma-Shave

 

Remember this
If you’d
Be spared
Trains don’t whistle
Because they’re scared
Burma-Shave


 

When better
Shaving brushes
Are made
We’ll still shave
Without their aid
Burma-Shave

 

When junior takes
Your ties
And car
It’s time to buy
An extra jar
Burma-Shave

 

Gets each
Whisker
At the base
No ingrown hair
On neck or face
Burma-Shave

 

If man bites doggie
That is news
If face
Scares doggie
Better use
Burma-Shave

 

At intersections
Look each way
A harp sounds nice
But it’s
Hard to play
Burma-Shave

 

Life is sweet
But oh how bitter!
To love a gal
And then
Not git ’er
Burma-Shave

 

Trains don’t wander
All over the map
For no one
Sits on
The engineer’s lap
Burma-Shave
 

When Peter Piper
Pickle picker
Kissed his gal
His beard
Would prick ’er
Burma-Shave

 

The answer to
A maiden’s prayer
Is a man
Most anywhere
Using
Burma-Shave

 

Rhyme and reason
Every season
You’ve read
The rhyme
Now try the reason
Burma-Shave

 

Wild
Dashes
From by-ways
Cause crashes
On highways
Burma-Shave

 

Substitutes
Resemble
Tail-chasing pup
Follow and follow
But never catch up
Burma-Shave

 

From
Bar
To Car
To
Gates ajar
Burma-Shave

 

If every sip
Fills you
With zip
Then your sipper
Needs a zipper
Burma-Shave

 

Broken romance
Stated fully
She went wild
When he
Went wooly
Burma-Shave

 

 

 

 


1942
Pa likes the cream
Ma likes the jar
Both like
The price
So there you are
Burma-Shave

 

Brother speeders
Let’s
Rehearse
All together
"Good morning, Nurse!"
Burma-Shave

 

’Mid rising
Taxes
Soaring rents
Still half a pound
For fifty cents
Burma-Shave

 

Approached
A crossing
Without looking
Who will eat
His widow’s cooking?
Burma-Shave

 

Drove too long
Driver snoozing
What happened next
Is not
Amusing
Burma-Shave

 

Stores are full
Of shaving aids
But all you need
Is this
And blades
Burma-Shave

 

Pa acted
So tickled
Ma thought
He was pickled
He’d just tried
Burma-Shave

 

Iceman’s grandson
Now full grown
Has cooling system
All his own
He uses
Burma-Shave

 

If you
Don’t know
Whose signs
These are
You can’t have
Driven very far
Burma-Shave

 

Let’s make Hitler
And Hirohito
Look as sick as
Old Benito
Buy defense bonds
Burma-Shave

 

Can’t shave daily?
Tender hide?
Now be honest
Have you
Tried
Burma-Shave

 

There’s no whisker
It won’t soften
Shave ’em close
And not
So often
Burma-Shave

 

If hugging
On highways
Is your sport
Trade in your car
For a davenport
Burma-Shave

 

Shaving brush
In army pack
Was straw that broke
The rookie’s back
Use brushless
Burma-Shave

 

A girl
Should hold on
To her youth
But not
When he’s driving
Burma-Shave

 

Maybe you can’t
Shoulder a gun
But you can shoulder
The cost of one
Buy defense bonds
Burma-Shave

 

Of all
The drunks
Who drive on Sunday
Some are still
Alive on Monday
Burma-Shave

 

"At ease," she said
"Maneuvers begin
When you get
Those whiskers
Off your chin"
Burma-Shave

 

Substitutes
Like unseen barter
Often make one
Sad
But smarter
Burma-Shave

 

Traveling men
Know ease
And speed
Their shaving kits
Hold what they need
Burma-Shave

 

What you shouted
May be true,
But
Did you hear
What he called you?
Burma-Shave

 

Buying defense bonds
Means money lent
So they
Don’t cost you
One red cent
Burma-Shave

To most brush shavers
It’s quite clear
The yanks aren’t coming
The yanks are here
Use brushless
Burma-Shave


1943
Every shaver
Now can snore
Six more minutes
Than before
By using
Burma-Shave

 


One pound jar 85 ¢
Half pound jar 50 ¢
Big tube 35 ¢
Don’t put it off
Put it on
Burma-Shave

 

Half a pound
For
Half a dollar
Spread on thin
Above the collar
Burma-Shave

 

Shaving brushes
You’ll soon see ’em
On the shelf
In some Museum
Burma-Shave


Does your husband
Misbehave
Grunt and grumble
Rant and rave
Shoot the brute some
Burma-Shave

 

It’s a good
Old Spanish custom
Take your mug
And brush
And bust ’em
Burma-Shave

 

Early to bed
Early to rise
Was meant for those
Old fashioned guys
Who don’t use
Burma-Shave

 

Within this vale
Of toil
And sin
Your head grows bald
But not your chin — Use
Burma-Shave

 

The cannoneers
With hairy ears
On wiry whiskers
Used tin shears
Until they found
Burma-Shave

 

Film protects
Your neck
And chin
So your razor
Won’t dig in
Burma-Shave

 
Tho tough
And rough
From wind and wave
Your cheek grows sleek
With
Burma-Shave
Many a wolf
Is never let in
Because of the hair
On his
Chinny-chin-chin
Burma-Shave

1945
She raised cain
When he raised stubble
Guess what
Smoothed away
Their trouble?
Burma-Shave

 


Big mistake
Many make
Rely on horn
Instead of
Brake
Burma-Shave

 

From statistics
That we gather
The swing is to
No brush
No lather
Burma-Shave

 

No man can really
Do his stuff
With a face that’s sore
Or a chin
That’s rough
Burma-Shave

 


First men buy it
Then apply it
Then advise
Their friends
To try it
Burma-Shave

 


If these
Signs blur
And bounce around
You’d better park
And walk to town
Burma-Shave

 

This is not
A clever verse
I tried
And tried
But just
Got worse

 

You can beat
A mile a minute
But there ain’t
No future
In it
Burma-Shave

 

Sleep in a chair
Nothing to lose
But a nap
At the wheel
Is a permanent snooze
Burma-Shave

 

Life with father
Is more pleasant
Since
He got this
Birthday present
Burma-Shave

 

 

 
 

 
1945
To a substitute
He gave a trial
It took off
Nothing
But his smile
Burma-Shave

 

It spreads so smooth
It shaves so slick
It feels
Like velvet
And it’s quick
Burma-Shave

 

’Twould be
More fun
To go by air
If we could put
These signs up there
Burma-Shave

 

His line was smooth
But not his chin
He took her out
She took him in
To buy some
Burma-Shave

 


Drinking drivers
Enhance their
Chance
To highball home
In an ambulance
Burma-Shave

 


Why does a chicken
Cross the street?
She sees a guy
She’d like to meet
He uses
Burma-Shave

 


The chick
He wed
Let out a whoop
Felt his chin and
Flew the coop
Burma-Shave

 

Tested
In peace
Proven in war
Better now
Than ever before
Burma-Shave

 

Both hands
On wheel
Eyes on road
That’s the skillful
Driver’s code
Burma-Shave

 


1947
You’ve used
Our cream
Now try our blades
Pair up the best
In shaving aids
Burma-Shave

 


Don’t lose
Your head
To gain a minute
You need your head
Your brains are in it
Burma-Shave

That she
Could cook
He had his doubts
Until she creamed
His bristle sprouts with
Burma-Shave

Famous last words
"If he won’t
Dim his
I won’t
Dim mine"
Burma-Shave

 

The wolf
Who longs
To roam and prowl
Should shave before
He starts to howl
Burma-Shave

 


Car in ditch
Driver in tree
Moon was full
And so
Was he
Burma-Shave

 


As you drive
Play this game
Construct
A jingle
With this name
Burma-Shave

 

Substitutes
That promise perfection
Are like
Some candidates
After election
Burma-Shave

 


If a gift
You must choose
Give him
One that
He can use
Burma-Shave

 


Santa’s
Whiskers
Need no trimmin’
He kisses kids
Not the wimmin
Burma-Shave

 

When the stork
Delivers a boy
Our whole
Darn factory
Jumps for joy
Burma-Shave

 

Altho
We’ve sold
Six million others
We still can’t sell
Those coughdrop brothers
Burma-Shave

 

Join
Our happy
Brushless throng
Six million users
Can’t be wrong
Burma-Shave

 

We know
How much
You love that gal
But use both hands
For driving, pal
Burma-Shave

 

In Cupid’s little
Bag of trix
Here’s the one
That clix
With chix
Burma-Shave

 

Thrifty jars for
Stay at homes
Handy tubes
For him
Who roams
Burma-Shave

 

I use it too
The bald man said
It keeps my face
Just like
My head
Burma-Shave

 

Grandpa’s
Out with
Junior’s date
Old technique
With brand new bait
Burma-Shave

 

No soggy brushes
In your grip
You’ve always
Got a
Finger tip
Burma-Shave

 

If you want
A hearty squeeze
Get our
Female
Anti-freeze
Burma-Shave

 

Substitutes would
Have their place
If you could
Substitute
Your face
Burma-Shave

 

Man passes
Dog house
Dog sees chin
Dog gets out
Man gets in
Burma-Shave

 

A guy
Who wants
To middle-aisle it
Must never scratch
His little violet
Burma-Shave

 

Prices rising
O’er the nation
Here is one
That missed
Inflation
Burma-Shave

 

The first
Improvement
In many a year
For cleaning teeth
Is finally here
Burma-Vita Tooth Powder

 

Speaking of
Great events
Burma-Shave
Proudly presents
Another fine product
Burma-Vita Tooth Powder

 

Just moisten
Your tooth brush
Dip in jar
And you’ll enjoy
Cleaner teeth by far
Burma-Vita Tooth Powder

 

Don’t waste powder
Down the drain
By missing brush
With faulty aim
A dip does it
Burma-Vita Tooth Powder

 

Better tooth cleanser
Low expense
Your druggist
Sells it
40 cents
Burma-Vita Tooth Powder

 

Tobacco stains
And stale breath too
Are two
Of the things
It takes from you
Burma-Vita Tooth Powder

 


1948
Road
Was slippery
Curve was sharp
White robe, halo
Wings and harp
Burma-Shave

 


Hat and tie
Smart and clean
Space between
Spoiled the scene
He should use
Burma-Shave

The boy who gets
His girl’s applause
Must act
Not look
Like Santa Claus
Burma-Shave

Within this vale
Of toil
And sin
Your head grows bald
But not your chin—use
Burma-Shave

 

Speed
Was high
Weather was not
Tires were thin
X marks the spot
Burma-Shave

 

Why work up
A daily lather
Once you’ve tried
We’re sure
You’d rather
Burma-Shave

 

 

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1948
If you think
She likes
Your bristles
Walk bare-footed
Through some thistles
Burma-Shave

 

The more
You shave
The brushless way
The more you’ll be
Inclined to say—
Burma-Shave

 

Substitutes and
Imitations
Send ’em to
Your wife’s
Relations
Burma-Shave

 

Highways are
No place
To sleep
Stop your car
To count your sheep
Burma-Shave

 

The minutes
Some folks
Save through speed
They never even
Live to need
Burma-Shave

 

At school zones
Heed instructions!
Protect
our little
Tax deductions
Burma-Shave

 

Regardless of
Political views
All good parties
Always
Choose
Burma-Shave

 

The midnight ride
Of Paul
For beer
Led to a
Warmer hemisphere
Burma-Shave

 

It’s not
How fast or slow
You drive
The question is
How you arrive
Burma-Shave

 

A man who passes
On hills and curves
Is not a man
Of iron nerves—
He’s crazy!
Burma-Shave

 

I’ve read
These signs
Since just a kid
Now that I shave
I’m glad I did
Burma-Shave

 

We don’t
Know how
To split an atom
But as to whiskers
Let us at ’em
Burma-Shave

 

Paper hangers
With the hives
Now can
Shave with
Carving knives
Burma-Shave

 

Wild men pulled
Their whiskers out
That’s what made
Them wild
No doubt—
Burma-Shave

 

Look
Don’t listen
Pop is trying
A substitute
Instead of buying
Burma-Shave

 

Little Bo-Peep
Has lost her Jeep
It struck
A truck
When she went to sleep
Burma-Shave

 

A man
A miss
A car—a curve
He kissed the miss
And missed the curve
Burma-Shave

 

Whiskers
Easy come,
You know
Why not make them
Easy go?
Burma-Shave

 

 

1948 Anti-Inflation Series

Bargain hunters
Gather ’round
For fifty cents
Still
Half a pound
Burma-Shave
No price increase

 

Other things have
Gone sky high
Half a dollar
Still will buy
Half pound jar
Burma-Shave
No price increase

 

From New York town
To Pumpkin Holler
Still
Half a pound
For half a dollar
Burma-Shave
No price increase

 

A big
Improvement
Since the war
Is now on sale
In your drug store
Burma-Shave
No price increase

 

 

Tube immense
Still
35 cents
Easy shaving
Low expense
Burma-Shave
No price increase

 

 



 

 


1949
Leap year’s over
You’re safe, men
All you cowards
Can shave again
With brushless
Burma-Shave

 

If you
Must sample
Her "pucker paint"
Better drive
Where traffic ain’t
Burma-Shave

 

He saw
The train
And tried to duck it
Kicked first the gas
And then the bucket
Burma-Shave

 

Pull off
The road
To change a flat
Protect your life—
No spare for that!
Burma-Shave

 

It gave
Swell shaves before
Now you’ll like it
Even more
The new—improved
Burma-Shave

 

Headline news
For face
And chin
Now improved
With lanolin
Burma-Shave

 

His face
Was loved
By just his mother
He Burma-Shaved
And now—
Oh, brother

 

When frisky
With whiskey
Don’t drive
’Cause it’s
Risky
Burma-Shave

 

His beard
Was long
And strong and tough
He lost his
Chicken in the rough
Burma-Shave

 

Just this once
And just for fun
We’ll let you
Finish
What we’ve begun
? ? ?

Burma-Shave
 

With television
On the set
Stars are
Running out
To get
Burma-Shave

 

With A sleek cheek
Pressed to hers
Jeepers! Creepers!
How she purrs
Burma-Shave

 

Men
Who have to
Travel light
Find the handy tube
Just right
Burma-Shave

 

Since hubby
Tried
That substitute
He’s 1/3 man
And 2/3 brute
Burma-Shave

 

He always used
A steaming towel
And mug and brush
And language foul
’Til he tried
Burma-Shave

 

Tho tough
And rough
From wind and wave
Your cheek
Grows sleek with
Burma-Shave

 

In seventy years
Of brushin’ soap on
Gramps coulda painted
The pentagon
Use brushless
Burma-Shave

 

These three
Prevent most accidents
Courtesy
Caution
Common sense
Burma-Shave

 

Said one whisker
To another
Can’t get tough
With this stuff
Brother
Burma-Shave

 

Old Dobbin
reads these signs
Each day
You see, he gets
His corn that way
Burma-Shave

 

To soothe
And smooth
Your tender skin
It’s now improved
With lanolin
Burma-Shave

 

One Burma-Shave
The school boy cried
At least I'll smell
As if I tried
Burma-Shave

 

Ashes to ashes
Forests to dust
Keep Minnesota green
Or we’ll
All go bust
Burma-Shave

 

Ashes to ashes
Forests to dust
Keep Wisconsin green
Or we’ll
All go bust
Burma-Shave